Addictions

This past week I received an invite to pinterest. I'm officially addicted.

From my browsing and play time on pinterest i stumbled upon polyvore and developed another addiction. Here are some of my creations/inspiration.

I'm hoping these shiny outfits will distract you from the fact that i never gave a final update on the juice fast.

Did it work?

No.? ok...

Well, here's the update. We made it to day 6. I was emotionally dying inside (which is horrible that food had such a strong emotional connection to me - i think this post is appropriately titled.) Josh decided we needed to spend some quality time together and allow ourselves to be light hearted for the evening so we went out to dinner.

I don't regret breaking the fast early. I lost 15 lbs (and so far have kept off 8!) and truly felt like a "cleanse" took place. I obviously realized some unhealthy eating patterns (like my ridiculous mood swings, and constant eating when i'm not hungry + a carb heavy diet). Which I've tried to learn from and implement post-fast.

I think a more realistic plan moving forward would be green smoothie at breakfast (starting off the day right with tons of nutrients). A low sodium V8 at lunch + almonds as a snack throughout the day. and whatever I want for dinner (within reason).

This type of plan is much more feasible and would be a healthy structure/boundaries with lots of nutrients while still giving myself some wiggle room at dinner. I might actually give this a try sometime later this year for 20 or 30 days to see how it goes.

ANYWAY...onward to other things!

Oh...the weekend

Weekends are typically my favorite part of the week. Filled with eating out, relaxing, watching movies, reading, shopping Sunday morning church and time with friends. This weekend has been filled with all of the above mentioned things, with the exception of eating out, and i'm 2 degrees away from completely miserable.

The juice/blended green smoothie diet has been very difficult on our free flowing no schedule weekends. We helped a friend move on Saturday so at the end of the 3 hours of lifting heavy boxes and sweating in the Tennessee heat, both Josh and I were completely drained of every ounce of energy that we had. All either of us could think about on the the way home was eating a HUGE meal - didn't matter if it was pizza, mexican, burgers, or some other ridiculously bad for you greasy meal - we just wanted solid food that filled us up in our bellies!

Alas, we got home and forced ourselves to drink the leftovers we had of tomato, parsley, garlic, puree. It wasn't good, but it sustained us.  Later that night we went over to my sisters house to play games and they had artichoke dip and crackers...I let my self smell the dip...it was heavenly.

This weekend has been a true test of our emotional and physical beings. I'm realizing that some of the eating habits I have - like automatically wanting horrible food after working out or socially snacking - are deep rooted attachments that are going to take serious will power to resist after coming off this diet.

Below are our sad little videos from day 4 and 5. Here's to hoping that day 6, 7, 8 are easier!

Day 4

Day 5

Fat Tuesday and Some Thoughts on Lent

Happy Fat Tuesday people.

Are any of you giving up anything for Lent? I know lent is typically assumed a Catholic tradition, but in recent years more and more of my non-denominational or evangelical friends have been making sacrifices during this season. I've never really participated seriously in the past, but for some reason fasting during the season leading up to Easter when Jesus made the ultimate sacrifice seems like a good idea this year.

Last Thursday I was continuing through my Read-the-Bible-in-a-year-three-years plan and somehow it snuck up on me. There I was plowing my way though Luke reading about  Zacchaeus-the wee little man- Jesus riding into Jerusalem on a donkey, Jesus getting all upset about the market in the Temple, Jesus teaching about the end times, yadda, yadda (is that sac-religious?) and before I knew it - BAM - I was swept into the Last Supper and Crucifixion story with a completely new perspective and a tender heart.

As I read, it felt entirely real and present, like I was there with Him, my feet covered in dust as I munched on bread, sipped wine, laughed and reclined at Jesus's breast in the upper room.

I was the one who Jesus invited to the Mount of Olives to pray, but fell asleep while danger for my beloved Lord lurked in the shadows.

I was the one who was so confident that I would stand by Jesus to the end, but  less than 24 hours later denied Him three times during His darkest hours. His eyes piercing mine on the 3rd denial.

I was in the crowd confused and overwhelmed as people shouted "Crucify! Crucify! Crucify!" Not quite sure how things took such a dramatic turn from the warm "Hosannas!" that filled the streets a week before.

And I wept and wept as I read how they hurled insults at Him, mocked Him, humiliated Him, and beat Him within an inch of His life as He hung naked, black-blue and blood soaked on the Cross.

I wept as I read that a few breaths away from death, He spoke mercy and love over his accusers. How His gentle heart showed grace and compassion for the criminal hanging next to him. How even as He stumbled to the place called "the skull," where he would be crucified he found a way to encourage the women weeping over His death.

And the lines on my Bible began to blur under the tears as I found myself literally gasping for breath and sobbing loudly at my dining room table. Overwhelmed by the price that my perfect, precious Jesus paid. Overwhelmed at how selfish and self-centered I am sometimes. And thankful beyond what prayers or useless words on a page can convey...

Willow stared at me, very concerned for her mama('s sanity). I glanced at the clock. Blew my nose from the runny snot-fest. Re-applied some mascara and some powder to my blotchy face. I needed to pull myself together. I was on my lunch break and had to go back to work and be somewhat presentable. How is that possible with the weight of the cross hanging on my shoulders?

Now, I know the story ends well. He doesn't stay on that tree forever, but I can't stop thinking about the sacrifice. All that Jesus did for me and I can't give up dessert/facebook/soda/TV/(Insert-distraction-here) for 40 days? I guess i've made my decision. I will be participating in Lent, it's just a matter of what small sacrifice can I make? I guess you all will find out tomorrow.