Lately I have been overwhelmed by God's Love. A few weeks ago, I messed up...and I messed up bad. After the big screw-up I wallowed around in my guilt and shame for a few days. I felt depressed, frustrated at what I had done, mad at myself for slipping and sad that I felt like I had really let the Lord and the people around me down. I was humbled to say the least.
In the midst of all of this the Lord just started to show me little snippets of His love. Through my husband, my church, the Bible, and more. In a sense I did go back to square one and I had to be convinced that God could love me again because I fell so hard. I had to be reassured that He will be faithful and His Love is stronger than my sin and completely unfailing. It's not an unfailing love that is dependent on me being perfect...but it's unfailing ALL the time.
I sit here typing this blog today, knowing God's love in a stronger more passionate way than ever before. It's overwhelming to be completely forgiven. It's overwhelming to me that Jesus would DIE a horrific death on the cross to save me from literally hell because He loves me. It's overwhelming to me that He still pursues after me when I mess up and roll around in my selfish guilt and self loathing for a few days. It's overwhelming to me that He still wants to use me from this broken place where it barely feels like I should be allowed to be around other believers let alone minister to/with them. It's overwhelming to me that He would not only pull me from the place of guilt but bring me out on the other side with a renewed passion for Him...I guess that's just one of the many ways He works all thing together for my good....
He is such a worthy, powerful, magnificent Lord and friend. I am so thankful. I'm looking forward to experiencing more of His love in the coming season. Shoot, maybe I will even learn to love others with a fraction of the faithfulness and passion that He loves me. So amazing.