my iPod

So I kinda feel like my iPod has been sending me subliminal messages. For about two weeks now I have had the urge to get back into writing music. I wrote like 5 songs in college, made a weird demo CD in a dorm room and never went back. I did pass a few of said demos out to friends and family just for fun.

Randomlly this week a friend I haven't spoken to in a really long time facebooked me and told me she has been listening to my demo CD for like a week straight and wanted to know if I was working on anything new. I told her not really, but I would let her know.

After that conversation my iPod, which is on shuffle everyday while I am at work, starts to shuffle to MY 3 song demo CD like 2 times a day... Now, the concept of the "shuffle songs" feature is that you iPod is supposed to randomly play through all the songs that are on your iPod. However, I find it ironc that I don't remember EVER hearing my songs on my iPod before this conversation and now it keeps going back to my 3 songs....

It's kinda strange, but, it is effective. I am pretty sure I am going to start writing again...and soon.


Show Week

The Broadway Review is this weekend at Forrest Hills Baptist Church. The week before opening night is always crazy. It consists of practices till 11:00 p.m. (at least) every night, grabbing food when and where you can, constantly staring at your score and listening to your practice CD non-stop.

In spite of the madness this part of a show is always so much fun. It is when the most bonding happens in a cast. Everyone has to pull together to get it right and no one wants to be the weakest link. The first stumble though is always rough, but somehow by the end of the week things are good enough to get a Standing O on opening night (hopefully!).

I had forgotten how much I love doing this. Can't wait to see how things go on Friday!


Heavenly Things

The gym I go to is the YMCA otherwise known as "The Y". Being a christian organization they have a philosophy of building up members physical and spiritual health. At the front desk they have a bucket filled with "vitamins"...spiritual vitamins that is. They are little rolled up pieces of paper with a Bible verse or encouraging word on them. Josh and I have a tradition of picking one up every time we leave a work out. To me it is kind of like a Godly fortune cookie for the day.

This morning my piece of paper said "Set your mind on things above, not on earthly things." Colossians 3:2. This particular verse is one that I have been clinging to lately. I have been working to memorize Colossians 3:1-4 which reads "Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory."

Last night I was reading and being pulled into God by a portion of the book Pursuit of the Holy by Corey Russel. I wanted to share a quote with you from that book. "Setting our minds is not a casual I-will-get-around-to-it-next-week attitude- it's a deliberate, focused resistance to anything that stands in the way of us getting rooted in God and the things of God. Paul was saying our life on earth isn't the extent of our life; that, in reality, we are seated with Christ in heavenly places and our true identity is found in accessing, even living in, the realm of the Spirit..."

This passage of the book and this verse from the Bible remind me that I am just an alien in a forigen land during my time here on earth. It was like God was reminding me this morning, through the vitamin, that he wanted me to place my heart and mind where My true identiy is seated at the right hand of God in the heavenly realms for eternity! While I am here on this planet I want to remain focused on Him and the things above and allow that to radiate through to others around me during my daily walk.


What Does it Hold?

Sometimes in life I end up disappointed. As I look back on all of these disappointments I realize that a lot of it comes from something I have tried very hard to achieve and then I fail. The goal that I set for myself or the thing I was striving for is just slightly out of my reach and I fall short. My hopes turn to sadness.

Most of the time it isn't for lack of trying on my part. Most of the time I try as hard as I can but it doesn't seem to be enough. There are several moments in my life that I can remember not getting something I wanted SOOO bad and being disappointed. The first one I can remember is was the church Christmas musical. The year before I was the lead angel and LOVED it. I can still remember the solo that I sang. The next year when the parts were posted and I didn't receive a single solo line in the whole show my little 8 year old heart was shattered. I cried and cried. I think I was eventually tossed a bone and ended up playing the part of the christmas box. It was an embarassing costume but I loved performing.

After that some other notable let downs include:
  • 7th grade - not making the volleyball team
  • 8th grade - not making the basketball team
  • 8th grade - not making the cheer leading squad
  • 11th grade - not getting a singing role in the school musical
  • 12th grade - not getting Cinderella in the school musical
  • 12th grade - not getting to sing the homecoming song at the pep-rally
  • Freshman Year College - not getting into Opera Workshop
  • Freshman Year College - realizing that my solo didn't make it onto the candles and carols DVD
  • Junior Year College - Not getting a part in the musical
  • Sr. Year College - being offered a job and then having the job taken away because of timing issues
  • Right now - Being offered a promotion and then finding out that it was given to someone else.
90% of the time most of these situations were horrible and I cried for a few days about them. Confused at why God would even allow me to desire such things, dangle them in front of my face, and let me to fail. And 90% of the time I realized why things didn't work out they way I wanted them to a few months or years later. God had bigger plans in store. He always does. He always knows what he is doing and I am always having to relearn this lesson. I am trying to quickly move on from this most recent upset. It's hard, but I am trying to stay focused on the future that God has in store for me. I have no idea what to expect, but I am excited to find out what it holds.